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dear sir, sometimes life is just simple like driving a car. you can make it fast when you want it, then you’ll slow it down when you feel it way too much. no need to thinking, just do it. it is getting weird when you start to think what will happen if i drive faster while there is no other car in the same way. will it hurt anybody else? of course no! make a wrong turn once or twice is usual. everybody has done with it. you never know which way is wrong if you dont pass that way, right? dont think too serious, dear.. life is always fun and happy. spending your time to keep thingking about the reason why somethings happened is sometimes useless. maybe you can start to assume that life has no consequences, then do those fun and happy thingy! believe me, you’ll happier than before ,or maybe crazier *eh? :D goodluck ;)